DON‘T TELL ME TO SUBSCRIBE

Almost every YouTuber now who has reached a particular number of subscribers, feels compelled to humbly boast about it on their channel by making a separate video just to announce it to the very people who have already subscribed and couldn‘t possibly be affected by the message in any particular way anyway. The channel owner apparently then becomes obligated to verbally inveigle the viewer into “SUBSCRIBING!” to their sodden little two-bulb-lit channel. 

It might well be part of the mysterious YouTuber partnership contract, whose existence itself has been kept a loose secret over the years, especially the payment, although some youtubers have found ways to indirectly display the approximate sums they receive. One of these is the bro-spect accumulating YouTuber calling himself Cr1tcal to give away his internet coins to actual people in actual life via charity organizations. Noob! I mean, woot!

However, if perpetually egging your already promised fans and followers into committing to follow the stream of videos you hatch out loosely every Tuesday at 3 am, filmed with your contemporary not-really-meant-for-this smartphone a.k.a. a techno-potato, and quick-cut edited together on Windows Movie Maker, in the sheer chance some bored internet wanderer might stroll onto the one you just birthed and would already have their brains washed thoroughly enough to blindly follow your annoying command to subscribe at the end of all that dribbling bore -- you might as well do precisely that. Your last chance is just hoping the person will then forget to un-press that same button, or leave in haste before doing so, and will never find your channel anywhere again. 

 

Youtube 2011 more or less; and you didn't need to subscribe to be pelted, covered, and caressed by videos with both elements of this irritating illustration.

 

Is the point of all the video etudes on YouTube then, to force you into promising you’ve enjoyed a piece of entertainment by clicking on something they told you to click? If I watched a video that I thought was utterly enjoyable and the makers of which I might probably want to share DNA with to produce offspring in hypothetical sub-fantasies expressed by the occasional outburst of a… smile, I would definitely be looking for a way to express both my interest and appreciation of the joy and I experienced with that piece of work! And it might just be possible I will perhaps find my own way to the subscription button if I come to a realization I can no longer live without the prospect of seeing something similar ever again! 

Over the years since YouTube started though, you have to admit it’s been keeping its ‘talents’ on a loose lead, allowing for somewhat a varied content and a pretty fare market where every viewer adds to who is considered popular and which shows prevail by direct response. That being said it’s pretty clear that any unified impositions on videos of the more popular youtubers would only cause harm to the common one-on-one feel of the video as well as the integrity of its creator. 

So I say, sod off with the imposed commands because there’s enough advertising around already and asking the viewer to look around the video box after having just watched it not only jerks you right back into the boring reality of a silent and unfortunately reflecting laptop screen but is also so painfully condescending it leaves both the entertainer and the viewer in quiet unease like they had just been told by a parent to hold hands and kiss after a small row. Awkward, unnecessary, and we all would much prefer to just let things happen as they do. 

[Picture source: http://fc09.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2011/112/d/d/ray_the_nyan_cat_by_thx1085-d3elb60.png]